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Ephemeral

by Rich Aucoin

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1.
We’ve all lived here alone and we’ll lose everything that we’ve known. Just 30,000 days to our name and all these stars look the same. We all want to conceive of something more than what we perceive. Now tell me life isn’t absurd when we can’t get one answered word.
2.
Have I found what I needed? Can you ever conceive it? If I heard it in nothing, will I see it in something? In times like this, I want to be a believer. Am I hardly existing? Can I see what I’m missing? When I die, is it ending? Can I go on pretending? In times like this, I want to be a believer.
3.
This heart is all that keeps us up, this heart is beating. Wear your love like the flower in your hair (this life is not long). Look around, there’s colour everywhere (this life is not done). Stay up late, there’s holders of the sun (this life is not long). Hold your breath, it’s always just begun (this life is not done). When you give it all up, you get it back. This heart is all that keeps us up, this heart is beating.
4.
We never opened up and we lost our trust. We never had enough, learning to adjust. We never quite arose to our own defeat. This is what we chose yelling in our sleep. They got away, can’t you believe it? We never had a rule for the world in space. We’re seeing everything, what a human race. We’re gonna lose the ground from below our feet. We’ll tell them what we found, yelling in our sleep. They got away, can’t you believe it? We never told the truth in the fear of death. It was in our youth, that we held our breath. We’re always just behind our own conceit. Spending all our time yelling in our sleep. They got away, can’t you believe it?
5.
Am I losing my mind? Cause it’s so hard to see and it’s hard to define what you’re doing to me. Am I losing it all? Cause it’s so hard to say and it’s harder to fall so I hide it away. And the voices stay, and we can’t get away. And they say obey. Is it me in control? Cause it’s so hard to see, and it’s harder to hold what you’re keeping from me. Is it time to let go? Cause it’s so hard to say and it’s harder to show so I hide it away. And the voices stay and we can’t get away. And they say obey.
6.
City I Love 03:24
In this city I love. And they say it could come but they could’ve lied. And they say you could run but you cannot hide. I couldn’t have bought that you didn’t try. I couldn’t have thought that you didn’t mind. And they say that we’re born and we’re gonna die. In this city we’re torn and we can’t align. And they say that we mourn what they would in time. Cause, brother, we’ve borne what they couldn’t find. In this city I love. And I’m sure it’ll numb in this heart of mine. I’m sure it’ll come but it’s hard to find. I couldn’t have come at a better time. I couldn’t have won with a better kind. And we’ll die here alone and it’s not enough. And we’ll leave it at home with a little luck. And they say that we formed what they would in time. Cause, brother, we’ve born what they couldn’t find. In this city I love.
7.
This, this is the start. We only just got here and soon we’ll part. But we still got four more years. You, you’re only here so long, Feels like I just met you and now you’re gone. And I, I’m alone so much. What good are friends you cannot touch? While we still got four more years. Friends, they always grow. But the more you meet, the less you’ll know. And I, I fucking miss my friends. I gotta tell you guys before it ends That we still got four more years.
8.
I Am Sorry 03:08
I’ll leave you under the sun waiting for no one. Reflections always appearing, show what I’m fearing. I’m sorry that I can’t hold on, so hold on. I’m sorry I’ve failed and repeated in something I need to believe it. We fear it, though it’ll come, sparing for no one. My mistakes always are mine, I’ll leave them behind. I’m sorry that I can’t hold on, so hold on. I’m sorry I’ve failed and repeated, in something I need to believe it.
9.
Let It Go 02:59
This is our time, let it go. Look at all the ways you’ve lost, and for what was the cost? Pushing past, it had you beat. When will you see defeat? Turning round, you found this blame, you think this is your pain. Turning all you love to dust, haven’t you had enough? Let it go.
10.
We get old and we break down the same. We will die and it’s over. Always, the same, always. We can see how we lost them, the same. We will know that it mattered. Always, the same, always.

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released September 9, 2014

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Rich Aucoin Halifax, Nova Scotia

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